NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
Lol
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Please be sure to read the rules and adhere to them. Some banned members have complained that they are not spammers. But they spammed us. Some even tried to redirect our members to other forums. Duh. Be smart. Read the rules and adhere to them and we will all get along just fine. Cheers. :beer: Link to the rules: https://www.forumsforums.com/threads/forum-rules-info.2974/
Tidbits AKA Groaners
- Thread starter Doc
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NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
Why don't vegans moan during sex?
Because they don't want anyone to know that a piece of meat makes them happy.
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Because they don't want anyone to know that a piece of meat makes them happy.
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A West Virginia state trooper, stopped a woman for going 15 miles over the speed limit.
After he handed her a ticket, she asked him,
"Don't you give out warnings?"
"Yes, ma'am," he replied. "They're all up and down the road. They say, 'Speed Limit 55.'"
After he handed her a ticket, she asked him,
"Don't you give out warnings?"
"Yes, ma'am," he replied. "They're all up and down the road. They say, 'Speed Limit 55.'"
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
I recently took a pole.
Everyone in the tent became upset when it collapsed.
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Everyone in the tent became upset when it collapsed.
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NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
...
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NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
...
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We had a power outage at our house this morning and my PC, laptop, TV, DVD, iPad & my new surround sound music system were all shut down. Then I discovered that my mobile phone battery was dead and, to top it off, it was raining outside, so I couldn't play golf and I decided to change the antifreeze in my Crossfire.
I then went to the garage only to find it was too dark to see and the garage doors wouldn’t open. I returned to the kitchen to make coffee and then I remembered that this also needs power, so I sat and talked with my wife for a couple of hours.
She seems like a nice person.
I then went to the garage only to find it was too dark to see and the garage doors wouldn’t open. I returned to the kitchen to make coffee and then I remembered that this also needs power, so I sat and talked with my wife for a couple of hours.
She seems like a nice person.
greatdiscovery
Banned
“Daddy, what is an alcoholic?”
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“Do you see those 4 trees, son? An alcoholic would see 8 trees.”
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“Um, Dad – there are only 2 trees.”
from https://short-funny.com/funniest-jokes-3.php
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“Do you see those 4 trees, son? An alcoholic would see 8 trees.”
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“Um, Dad – there are only 2 trees.”
from https://short-funny.com/funniest-jokes-3.php
Bannedjoe
Well-known member
Should this be in the jokes forum or groaners......
I'm guessing groaners.
Bottom of the ninth, score was tied, 2 outs, 2 strikes, 3 balls, bases loaded.
The countries sweetheart, Mel Famey was pitching.
Mel was pitching the last game of the season for the prize of winning the world series after a serious summer of excessing drinking.
His drinking had gotten so bad that his career was on the line. He tried time and time again to quit, but to no avail.
The pressure was proving to be too much. He snuck a few drinks during the game and it was beginning to show.
He threw what was sadly the last pitch of the game.
The ump yelled, Ball four!
He had lost the world series by one run.
After the stands had cleared, a couple players from the opposing team were walking across the field to their cars.
As they passed the pitchers mound, one looked down, pointed to a crushed can, and ask the other, What is that????
The other looked up and said....
That, was the beer that made Mel Famey walk us.
I'm guessing groaners.
Bottom of the ninth, score was tied, 2 outs, 2 strikes, 3 balls, bases loaded.
The countries sweetheart, Mel Famey was pitching.
Mel was pitching the last game of the season for the prize of winning the world series after a serious summer of excessing drinking.
His drinking had gotten so bad that his career was on the line. He tried time and time again to quit, but to no avail.
The pressure was proving to be too much. He snuck a few drinks during the game and it was beginning to show.
He threw what was sadly the last pitch of the game.
The ump yelled, Ball four!
He had lost the world series by one run.
After the stands had cleared, a couple players from the opposing team were walking across the field to their cars.
As they passed the pitchers mound, one looked down, pointed to a crushed can, and ask the other, What is that????
The other looked up and said....
That, was the beer that made Mel Famey walk us.
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
Lol
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NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
...
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NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
I lasted an hour and three minutes last night making love to my wife.
Thank you daylight savings time change.
[emoji1787][emoji1787][emoji1787]
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Thank you daylight savings time change.
[emoji1787][emoji1787][emoji1787]
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