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Tidbits and Groaners II
- Thread starter Doc
- Start date
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
I farted so hard yesterday that my fitbit counted 3000 steps.
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
I told my wife i wanted to be cremated.
She made an appointment for Tuesday.
She made an appointment for Tuesday.
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, you should try swimming with sharks...cost me an arm and a leg!
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
That wasn't a fart, it was an earthquake!
Reaper
Well-known member
You sure you dont need surgery afterwards?
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
I accidentally gave my wife a glue stick instead of lipstick.
She's still not talking to me.
She's still not talking to me.
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
How do you make a water bed more bouncy?
Add spring water
to it.
Add spring water
to it.
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
I'm confused how a cemetery can raise its funeral prices and blame it on the cost of living!
Don Coyote
Well-known member
Do cemeteries have a "Closing Time"?
Typically, there is a fence around the cemetery.
..... Is that to keep people OUT,..... or to keep people IN?
Typically, there is a fence around the cemetery.
..... Is that to keep people OUT,..... or to keep people IN?
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
Don Coyote
Well-known member
I'm alright..... for now.
..... (But nervous).
..... (But nervous).
Men have it easier then woman:
Men only have to shave their face and neck.
Men can play with toys all their life.
Men have 1 wallet and 1 pair of shoes -- 1 color for all seasons.
Men can wear shorts no matter how their legs look..
Men have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
Men can buy all the Christmas gifts while shopping on December 24 in 25 minutes.
Men only have to shave their face and neck.
Men can play with toys all their life.
Men have 1 wallet and 1 pair of shoes -- 1 color for all seasons.
Men can wear shorts no matter how their legs look..
Men have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
Men can buy all the Christmas gifts while shopping on December 24 in 25 minutes.
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
NorthernRedneck
Well-known member
Do lesbians actually cook?
Or do they just eat out?
Or do they just eat out?
knotsew innocent
New member
i've always wondered: who makes the sandwich???Do lesbians actually cook?
Or do they just eat out?
Don Coyote
Well-known member
......... are dildos vegan? 
Reaper
Well-known member
I have heard that they are fake meat. So, maybe they are.......... are dildos vegan?