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Forums. In the end, are they worth it?

The Tourist

The Tourist

Banned
I have a very good friend in another state that loves knives, new information and a good debate.

I have told him (actually admonished him) to treat forums akin to the frame of mind one would use at a 'happy hour' for used car salesmen.

Nice environment. Snappy conversation. Discount everything you hear.

But he's a good man. And he gets his feelings hurt. And that hurts me.

Recently on a knife forum they got into a serious dust up over a knife term. A one word knife term. In fact, I use the same word since there's a major differing in how the word is applied and understood in Japanese versus English.

The snobs hurt my friends feelings, and I was torn. First off, I'm not sure the snobs know as much about knives as they claim, despite the fact they are fully employed, professional cutlers and tinkers.

One snob makes the same knife over and over again is various modifications to the identical theme, the other rubs stuff with a wet rock. Neither seems to have ever cracked a history book, and many times incorrect information is printed to the www 'net. Let's be honest, most rookies read that stuff.

Due to their incredible plummet in information, decorum and simple enjoyment, I contacted a moderator some months ago in a PM and told him to ban me. I have a business to run, and if my clients believe I am within that circle of shaman I fear I will lose business or prestige.

Now granted, there were some legal issues, and I monitored that forum and copies were made available to my attorney for libel issues. Other than that, I kicked the dust from my sandals.

About this time another friend, a super mod elsewhere, openly opined on the telephone that he was considering leaving. Not his position as a mod, but from all hobbyist forums. His experience was simply that he had to wade through too much troll bait, but I understood. I quit going to townie bars thirty years ago for the same reason.

But I still have an obligation to my friend. I go to forums for fun, and I'm not afraid to use the 'ignore feature.' It seems an enlightened approach. I don't share the road with idiots who can't control a V-twin, so why should I waste bandwidth with some idiot bastard's brother in his mom's laundry room?

I'm torn. My gut tells me to go to this friend and tell him to disconnect his computer for a short spate and take up tying flies or needle-point. Or go to a bike shop, grab a chair and a cuppa and get to know folks who are worth the trouble.

There's more at stake here. A friend got hurt. I would never minimize or denigrate his feelings and experience.

You guys use forums, obviously. Anyone got a clue?
 
The Tourist said:
Now granted, there were some legal issues, and I monitored that forum and copies were made available to my attorney for libel issues. Other than that, I kicked the dust from my sandals.
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I don't know the extend of the issues, but I would say you are taking it way too seriously.
 
People take things to seriously, forums included. Life is to short.

The Internet is a tool, when used for work or other essential items, the rest is for relaxation.

No matter what some one knows, there is always someone else who thinks they know more and in a environment such as a forum on the Internet it is everyone.
 
Forums are like this.
 

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While MOST of what I do on various forums is social, I will say that there is a huge amount of VALUABLE information on many topics.

Our SNOWCAT forums are absolutely amazing in the depth and wealth of information that has been shared by our members. While SNOWCATS are not a big thing in the real world, those of us who own them have come here for one reason, this forum is THE AUTHORITY and MAIN SOURCE for information exchange and knowledge on these machines.

So there is SOME real use for forums. But mostly they are social.
 
'Dog, I agree 100%.

The problem here is perception.

I have heard several actors opine on late night talk shows that they will get dozens of positive movie reviews and only one bad one. However, it's that one bad one that sticks in their craw and haunts them.

I'm having trouble teaching him that.

He's a moral man, he has scruples and he treats all people with respect.

What we have here is a charade. Two guys have him believing they know more than he does. There's an easy explanation for this in the knife community. Let's see the poser's personal knife. The rest is crap.

I've heard some folks use the term "thick skin." That's not quite it. I have critics by the dozen. Most of them can't hold a V-twin up or get girls. Either that or their moms won't buy them a bike or let them date at that age.

Skin or not, you can't teach that. I believe there exists the much coveted "a-hole gene."

I'm thinking of offering him a bone marrow transplant.

Seriously, I think my friend should take a computer break. I do it once in a while, and it's valuable time. I read more, I get more client's knives completed, my colon runs better, I get lots more miles on my bike. If I didn't have to use the computer so much for research and ordering, I'd get along great with just magazines. That's what I did before I bought my first computer.

Why, oh why, are people so troubled by bullies?
 
Ditto what Bob said, they are a social outlet. You have an interest and find a forum centered around that activity and you are bound to find like minded people there that you want to socialize with. You are into knife sharpening so you find a site centered around that activity. I am here because I was on another site that was centered around one common interest and then I was invited here. Forums Forums is a little different in that there is one subject, but more of a free for all. Things get heated here from time to time, but that is the nature of this format and because it isn't centered around one activity or subject there is going to be diversity that will cause you not to get along with everyone here at all times.
 
T4U, it sounds like Chico's buddy found himself "touting a Kubota among Kioti Police."

Actually, I visit a few forums; this is the only one I do for social purposes [rather than to gleen and share specific information], though sometimes can't resist joining a slightly off topic thread elsewhere.

I know easier said than done, but like physical friends and aquintances, all people have their strengths and flaws; and some just like to argue too - you have to take things for what they are worth and no more on the internet: just like the coffee shop, bar, ball diamond, or any "hang out."

I'd say you steered him right in explaining exactly that; and if he still can't quite take it that way, then perhaps an internet break may be the medicine. Unfortunately, if he always takes things that personal, he may find himself consternated not long after he joins a discussion again.
 
A sabbatical totally away from the computer can do wonders for the mind and spirit. I have taken time off and away now and then to retain my sanity as person with a real life beyond the cyber highway. I do believe too many people live, breath and die with the idea the computer is the light when it is often the very dark shadow hanging over your head.....:whistling:
 
I think a sabbatical is the perfect answer. My friend has verbalized that getting stabbed in the back by people he has formerly respected brings him the most pain.

(Personally, I always test forum people. For example, if I think a "biker" I am corresponding with is a poser, I'll tell him something like, "My mousetrap is giving me problems on my twin cam." Harley-Davidson quit using mousetraps decades ago. A real biker knows that.)

I've tested many of you.
 
The Tourist said:
(Personally, I always test forum people. For example, if I think a "biker" I am corresponding with is a poser, I'll tell him something like, "My mousetrap is giving me problems on my twin cam." Harley-Davidson quit using mousetraps decades ago. A real biker knows that.)

I've tested many of you.
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Maybe the guy is a polite biker and not a poser and he just thinks you are a poser that doesn't know any better.

Why test the people here?
 
Added to this mix is the fact that I don't give a rip anymore (or less) in calling someone out on the statements they make. If they are right, then it's easy to prove. I get especially angry if I believe the guy is lying. "Stupid" I can deal with, you just show him where the info is.

And I caught one of the guys. My friend really looks up to these guys, and he wanted to learn about the special skill the professionals have on high-end edges.

One guy told him that only the edges he provided were valid, "because all samurai swords" had this style of edge.

My opinion is that he is taking advantage of the usual American misunderstanding about samurai swords. We here seem to endow that style of blade with special super powers. And while they are fine examples of craftsmanship and materials they have a well documented history, and you can learn about it. It called a "history book."

I serve a small niche market, and I sharpen with what's known as a "polished V-grind edge." I do slicing implements, not camp axes.

Certain samurai swords have been polished in this fashion for over 800 years, and there's a name for it. Hira-niku-sukunai. To say otherwise is like yelling that all Fords have Chevy engines.

Granted, it's a small matter, but my friend was searching out facts and procedures from a man he respected. And got hurt for his trouble.

I don't care if this guru tells everyone that his edges can make people fly, like in the movie "Squatting Tiger, Retching Dragon." His conduct is his problem, I'm not his father, he can blow all of the smoke he wants.

Again, my concern is my friend, and the crux of this treatise only. Such information and lack of trust are major issues to him, despite the fact I give a rip. Yeah, I'm getting crotchety in my old age.
 
People do take arguments on the internet far too seriously. To me its a discussion more than an argument. This forum is th only one with people of intellect Ive found that its even WORTH bringing up discussions.
 
Deadly Sushi said:
People do take arguments on the internet far too seriously.
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Arguments I don't mind. I'm a big boy. My nose has been broken twice. I've learned it doesn't hurt that bad.

But my friend got his feelings hurt by betrayal. And that is the deepest cut of all.

Oh, BTW, to my enemies, mark your calendars for late April, early may.

You can say anything you like about me without restraint. During that first few weeks, I'll be on the highway exclusively.

I don't mind now, but in the winter you get a rebuttal. In spring you get bupkus.
 
OK, I am going bite. What is this chip you have on your shoulder? You have been on this forum a month and you have enemies? If the most recent discussions here make you think you have enemies, well bless your little heart because you are thin skinned. You have used the phrase enemies, they will drowned in my blood and I will go for steel. You sound like a 13 year old kid. All I see is a guy that is intent on letting everyone know what a bad ass biker he is and reminding us in every thread that he is a biker and a tinker. What gives?
 
Tractors4u said:
OK, I am going bite. What is this chip you have on your shoulder? You have been on this forum a month and you have enemies? If the most recent discussions here make you think you have enemies, well bless your little heart because you are thin skinned. You have used the phrase enemies, they will drowned in my blood and I will go for steel. You sound like a 13 year old kid. All I see is a guy that is intent on letting everyone know what a bad ass biker he is and reminding us in every thread that he is a biker and a tinker. What gives?
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Take it for what it is worth, but Tractor dude just gave you some very sound advice . Usually I find that the real bad ass don't have to keep reminded everybody how bad he is . I'm a lot more aware of the quiet one with the big stick .

Truth be told . You could be a 47 year old ,unmarried ,virgin , second grade male teacher at Madison Elementry school who happens to be a computer geek who just is living out his inner feelings.:unsure:

Now what you need to do is go take the training wheels off your bicycle , ditch the playin cards in the spoke wheels , remove the tassels and horn from the handle bars and just see what happens . It would not hurt to wave at other peole once in a while either as you go by . :thumb:
 
Tourist, I dont think anyone here is your enemy. We talk smack and get into heated discussions. If you dont enjoy that, then I dont know what to tell ya. I think youre a nice guy. Just try to relax and give it some time :thumb:
 
Forums have their value. I mean... Think about all the different people that are right here, from all around the world.

wanna see somethin cool? Bikes as far as the eye can see (the road bends and they continue on)
 

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BigAl said:
Take it for what it is worth, but Tractor dude just gave you some very sound advice.
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Why his way? I think guys who give advice like this contribute to the wussery of the American male.

The guy I mentioned is my friend. What it takes, it takes. That's the point.

As for advice, most of you guys just told me that forum advice is worthless, anyway. Why should I start taking it now?

If you think it's worthless at the front of the thread, it's worthless now.
 
The Tourist said:
I think a sabbatical is the perfect answer. My friend has verbalized that getting stabbed in the back by people he has formerly respected brings him the most pain.

(Personally, I always test forum people. For example, if I think a "biker" I am corresponding with is a poser, I'll tell him something like, "My mousetrap is giving me problems on my twin cam." Harley-Davidson quit using mousetraps decades ago. A real biker knows that.)

I've tested many of you.
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Tourist,


Lighten up buddy. This is the net and you meet all kinds of people. Some don’t know didly-squat about anything. Still these people act like they do and comment about every subject. They THINK that no-one knows who they are. Some just try and piss everyone off. A little negative attention, and they must crave it.
What I have learned this week:
Texas.
Catholics.
Sick. (everybody is sick, I’m the only one that is not)Ha-Ha
Who cares?
I just get on the net to have fun.
I like all the people on FF and some I agree to disagree with. I would not try and test anyone, don’t care.
I pulled one off… I spelled court of oil.. Had a brain fart. Never got corrected.. They must of considered the source. It’s fun here.
:mrgreen:
 
The Tourist said:
As for advice, most of you guys just told me that forum advice is worthless, anyway. Why should I start taking it now?

If you think it's worthless at the front of the thread, it's worthless now.
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You do realize that what You said is reciprocall don't You ?
 
Guys, I don't think you're getting it.

When you state you're somebody's friend that means that not only do you get invited to parties, but you have a responsibilty.

My friend felt betrayed. Now, you and I might think that's just the price of admission to talk to guys in their mom's laundry room.

In most cases, I'd agree.

But my friend has told me right up front that betrayal hurts him deeply.

Sobeit, then if I'm his friend, then it's a big deal to me, too.

That friendship trumps a broken nose, my reputation, my enjoyment of this bandwidth and ridicule. It trumps everything.

If I have to explain that to you at any level, I actually pity you. At the end of the day I wonder if you ever had a true friend.

Now, the "training wheel" issue came up. Fair enough. Let's address it.

When you patch, this friendship issue is tantamount to anything you do. So serious is this idea that we call each other "bro" or "blood." And yes, it's a burden.

You wipe up a lot of vomit, you take your last five bucks to buy the guy a sandwich or for bail money--or get your nose broken.

And get this, the idea of friendship is not something I give easily. This guy is my friend. I'm not too sure many of you would qualify, which is too bad. I'm a good friend.
 
I hung out for many years on a Gay Bay liberal web site (didn’t know it at the time). I never got kicked off even though I was the biggest a$$ that I could be. Never passed up a comment where I could make them look as stupid as they were. I won’t argue with them, I state my point and drop it.
They made me dislike the place when they announced gay pride day. Then for a month they had pictures of these fine folks.
I do notice that I still get hits on my log in name. I do like a couple of girls on that site. (friends only)
 
If I have to explain that to you at any level, I actually pity you. At the end of the day I wonder if you ever had a true friend.
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We all have friends. I just DONT expound on them or the topic. I think I speak for most everyone here on that matter. But if ya care to pity us thats peachy. :thumb:


Not sure if this thread is going anywhere constructive. It might be one of those that lasts forever with folks trying to get in the last word.
 
Darroll, I never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would debating the concept of friendship--and losing the discussion.

A friend is just about the most valuable thing there is. I'm confused at why I have to explain that.
 
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