Men Speak out!

FrancSevin

Proudly Deplorable
GOLD Site Supporter
I stumbled onto this list whilst cleaning out my desk today.
Posted for your reading pleasure.

1) Men are not mind readers.
1) Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl now. If it is up put it down. We need it up, you need it down. That's why if has hinges. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1) Sunday sports are like the changing of the tide, cycles of the moon. LET IT BE.
1) Shopping is not a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it in that way.
1) Crying is blackmail.
1) Ask for what you want. let us be clear on this one; Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work! Just say it.
1) Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1) Come to us with a problem only if you really want HELP in solving it. That's what we do, solve problems. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1)A headache that persists every night for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
1) Anything we said 6 moths ago is in-admissible in an argument.
1) If you won't dress like Victoria Secret girls, don't expect us to be soap opera guys.
1) If you think you are fat, you probably are. don't ask us.
1) If something we said can be interpreted two ways, one of which makes you sad or mad, we meant it the other way.
1) You can either ask us to do something, or, tell us how you want it done. Not both.
1) If you already know how to do it, might be better to just go ahead and do it yourself.
1) Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1) Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.
1) All men see in only 16 colors. Peach is not a color. It is a fruit. So is melon. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1) If it itches, we will scratch it.
1) If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing" we will take you at your word. We understand you are likely lying but getting to the bottom of the issue is not worth the hassle.
1) If you ask a question to which you really don't want an answer, expect an answer you didn't want to hear.
1) When you go somewhere, whatever you wear is fine,,,; no really, it's just fine.
1) You have enough clothes
1) You have too many shoes
1) I am in shape. Round IS a shape.


The list is numbered in order of priorities. And yes, I know I'm sleeping on the couch tonight. Don't worry, it's like camping out without the skeeter's.
 

mla2ofus

Well-known member
GOLD Site Supporter
It appears you came in here stepping on toes left and right just to see if you could find a button or two to push. I won't say you're stupid but I will say you're ignorant, which can be educated and stupid cant, of the fact you haven't exactly made any friends here with your attitude. You've probably set a new site record for how many ignore lists you're on and after this post you'll be on mine.
 
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