I pee off my back porch

My wife thinks this is wrong.

My dogs pee outside all the time.

Sometimes we do a group pee on the back oak tree.....

Its a mans right to pee off the portch aint it?

I never drip a drop on the portch.....always hit the grass.
As long as I pee where humans are not likely to walk n slip or stop n sit in my pee, and as long as no one can see my schlong, I feel I have met two of polite society's most basic responsibilities.
The O.P. brings this classic blues tune to mind.

Lou Rawls - I'd Rather Drink Muddy Water​

"I'd rather drink muddy water and "pee off my back porch.

Re: I pee off my back portch

A thread about peeing... I should have joined sooner... I pee all over my place too. Best part is.. so does my wife... We can get home, park in the driveway and down come her pants to pee in the grass. All she has to do it walk in the house and the bathroom is right there... it cracks me up... of course our 5 y/o daughter has gotten the same way.. she gets busy outside with the dogs and horses and she pees where ever she is. I OTOH have a different strange compulsion. If I drink beer at your house to any level of intoxication... I WILL relieve myself on one or more of you bushes/trees before I leave. It does not matter how cold it is. Something about drinkin beer that tells me I need to pee outside. Similarly at home if I am drinkin and watchin TV with the wife I will go out the front door and pee off the porch rather than goin to the bathroom. If I don't pause the DVR I can see the TV still if I want to....
I love reading your colorfully amusing urination rituals and would defend your right to continue those quaint habits as long as they work for you and yours.

But, I would not expect you would do this in the city.


Bottoms Up
Staff member
GOLD Site Supporter
My wife has no problem squatting when needed. When her sister was out jeeping with us and had to go we suggested the squatting, she was appalled. No way. The bumpy 20 min ride to the facilities had to be painful for her. LOL

Ross 650

Well-known member
Site Supporter
since I live in the woods, I pee off my front porch and my side porch. When the urge hits I leter rip!!! Now yesterday I saw a different rip. There is a small bus that comes down my road to pick up a neighbor. Well, I saw the bus yesterday on the side of the road and the lady driver was leaning back on the rear bumper with her britches down and was having a good old country pee. I waved and she waved back. Life is good in the woods!!!!!