dzalphakilo
Banned
Funny story I was talking about last night and though some here might find it amusing.
Went up to Canada some time ago with three guys kayaking. Two guys were a father and son duo. You got to know the father, BIG balls, and I know where his sons get it. The son is crippled from the waist down due to an accident some time ago.
Well, we’re going kayaking on the Ottawa river. Whitewater on the Ottawa is pretty big for east coast standards, seems like your putting on a lake and you’re wondering were the river is.
Well, the first big “hole” in the first rapid (McCoy’s) is “Phil’s hole” (named after a guy from Maryland believe it or not). We’ll, we all run the first rapid. Trick is you run just to the right of Satler’s hole on river left, “threading the needle” between Satler’s and Phil’s hole that is on your right side. The guy’s son who can’t walk is running it last so we can be down below him if there is a problem.
Well, all four of us get down no problem and we’re waiting in an eddy below Phil’s hole for the last guy to run it (the one who has no use of his legs). Well, he happens to go right into Phil’s hole and gets the living snot kicked out of him. After what seemed like an eternity, he finally flushes out of the hole without his boat and paddle. We then have to navigate through some of the other smaller rapids to get him, his paddle and his boat.
Keep in mind, this guy cannot walk.
We pull him, the boat and paddle to land, and he looks at us and tells us he wants to run it again. Ok, so… we carry him, his boat paddle (along with all of our gear) BACK UP the rapid to run it again.
Well, we run it the same way, the guy who can’t walk runs it last again. Guess what? Back into that same hole he goes again, getting the living snot kicked out of him again. Same story about picking up all his gear. Get him on the bank of the river, and guess what he tells us? He wants to run it again.
Ok, now we’re getting a little tuckered out. But, we hike everything back up the rapid again to run it a third time.
Have to figure third time is a charm.
Well, for the third time this same guy goes into Phil’s hole. This time it seems like he’s in there even longer than the first two times. Only thing different this time is that he and his gear flushed out on river left side (previous two times he came out on river right). Crap, we’re all on river right side so now we have a little more work to do to get across the river to him. Only thing different this time is that as this guy is getting the living snot kicked out of him in the hole, a couple of boaters who we don’t know go by the hole as this guy is getting the crap kicked out of him and they see him come out of his kayak and finally flush out of the hole. Well, since they went right by him while he was stuck in the hole, they were closer to him when he started swimming and they decided to help him (since we were on the wrong side of the river)
Well, these guys who we don’t know pull our buddy to the river bank with all of his gear still intact (thankfully) on the other side of the river.
What I found somewhat confusing though is that while I was paddling over to the other side of the river to get to this guy, the guys who were helping (who we didn’t know) seemed rather frantic on the riverbank.
Since I was the first of our group to get to the other side of the riverbank, I asked the strangers (who was helping our buddy ) what the problem was.
They looked at me with a “hurried” look and mentioned frantically that there was a serious medical issue, that the man that they just rescued from the hole couldn’t walk and that they were trying to figure out how to get him medical attention.
I just looked at them and told them there wasn’t a problem because the guy they just rescued was crippled BEFORE he went paddling and the swim had nothing to do with it.
You should of seen the look they gave me, it was absolutely priceless. Thought we were nuts.
Only "problem" we had the whole day.
Went up to Canada some time ago with three guys kayaking. Two guys were a father and son duo. You got to know the father, BIG balls, and I know where his sons get it. The son is crippled from the waist down due to an accident some time ago.
Well, we’re going kayaking on the Ottawa river. Whitewater on the Ottawa is pretty big for east coast standards, seems like your putting on a lake and you’re wondering were the river is.
Well, the first big “hole” in the first rapid (McCoy’s) is “Phil’s hole” (named after a guy from Maryland believe it or not). We’ll, we all run the first rapid. Trick is you run just to the right of Satler’s hole on river left, “threading the needle” between Satler’s and Phil’s hole that is on your right side. The guy’s son who can’t walk is running it last so we can be down below him if there is a problem.
Well, all four of us get down no problem and we’re waiting in an eddy below Phil’s hole for the last guy to run it (the one who has no use of his legs). Well, he happens to go right into Phil’s hole and gets the living snot kicked out of him. After what seemed like an eternity, he finally flushes out of the hole without his boat and paddle. We then have to navigate through some of the other smaller rapids to get him, his paddle and his boat.
Keep in mind, this guy cannot walk.
We pull him, the boat and paddle to land, and he looks at us and tells us he wants to run it again. Ok, so… we carry him, his boat paddle (along with all of our gear) BACK UP the rapid to run it again.
Well, we run it the same way, the guy who can’t walk runs it last again. Guess what? Back into that same hole he goes again, getting the living snot kicked out of him again. Same story about picking up all his gear. Get him on the bank of the river, and guess what he tells us? He wants to run it again.
Ok, now we’re getting a little tuckered out. But, we hike everything back up the rapid again to run it a third time.
Have to figure third time is a charm.
Well, for the third time this same guy goes into Phil’s hole. This time it seems like he’s in there even longer than the first two times. Only thing different this time is that he and his gear flushed out on river left side (previous two times he came out on river right). Crap, we’re all on river right side so now we have a little more work to do to get across the river to him. Only thing different this time is that as this guy is getting the living snot kicked out of him in the hole, a couple of boaters who we don’t know go by the hole as this guy is getting the crap kicked out of him and they see him come out of his kayak and finally flush out of the hole. Well, since they went right by him while he was stuck in the hole, they were closer to him when he started swimming and they decided to help him (since we were on the wrong side of the river)
Well, these guys who we don’t know pull our buddy to the river bank with all of his gear still intact (thankfully) on the other side of the river.
What I found somewhat confusing though is that while I was paddling over to the other side of the river to get to this guy, the guys who were helping (who we didn’t know) seemed rather frantic on the riverbank.
Since I was the first of our group to get to the other side of the riverbank, I asked the strangers (who was helping our buddy ) what the problem was.
They looked at me with a “hurried” look and mentioned frantically that there was a serious medical issue, that the man that they just rescued from the hole couldn’t walk and that they were trying to figure out how to get him medical attention.
I just looked at them and told them there wasn’t a problem because the guy they just rescued was crippled BEFORE he went paddling and the swim had nothing to do with it.
You should of seen the look they gave me, it was absolutely priceless. Thought we were nuts.
Only "problem" we had the whole day.