Shady new member

You all gotta check the locks on the doors because I waltzed right in unchecked. This place has less security than a George Harrison home.

What's up peeps? Nice to meet you all. A good friend from another forum told me about this place. I wasn't going to join but when I heard one of the methane breathers from the same forum whine about how awful this place was and that he was banned from here I figured this place must be better than a Charlie Sheen bachelor party. So here I am.

I'll warn you all now. I'm extremely satirical, sarcastic, and feel anything and everything can and should be poked fun at. If you have no sense of humor or lost yours in a tragic mining accident let me know and I'll round up the bloodhounds and send out a search party to find it.

First and foremost I love comedy and writing. I'm also a huge sports fan. If you dislike the Redskins, Capitals, or Nationals, you should be forced to go driving or flying with a Kennedy family member. I also am heavily into movies, music, and of course politics.

That's it for now. If you wanna know something else ask. Now if you excuse me I'm gonna check out what liquor brands you stock the cabinets with in the lounge. If I see one wine cooler I'm rioting.

Welcome aboard. New guy buys the beers!

well, if he buys- hi, new guy. i'll take a vodka ( i'll take 5) topped w/ pinnacle, followed by a blue ribbon. or 30.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ya come in here singing a good song, but the proof of your worthiness (to be determined...) will be in your staying power through the tough times. Being a newbie is easy. Sit your ass down and try to stay out of the way until you're called upon.

Oh yeah...I'm supposed to say welcome to you, so consider it done.

Skins suck Caps suck Nats suck. Welcome to FF.

BTW, feel free to raid the liquor cabinet. Muleman refilled it last, and the cheap bastard bought Banker's Club.

Hi HJ!

How long do we have to wait for you to say something witty?

Redskins, Caps & Nats? Are those major league teams? Really?

So you like politics huh? Did you come here wanting to cash in on Doc's very generous offer of a free steak dinner to become our resident liberal or do you have your head screwed on RIGHT?

We have little security because we have two big guard dogs. Rusty and Mule. Better watch out for those two. They can bite.

All in good jest of course. Now welcome, observe and learn

I see you have 3 thanx already so you must be doing something right.

Hairy Jello!!!
Love the name. Welcome to the mad house.

Ah just another blow hard, like we need more .................... and BTW, sports teams that don't wear black and gold don't count around here.

You can expect to spend a lot of time licking your wounds in the corner ...... come on in, enjoy ur time being fresh meat!

welcome to FF....get stuck in the toilet is blocked

Have fun

Thanks for the welcome everyone. Seems like an all right place so will give it a shot.

luvs said:

well, if he buys- hi, new guy. i'll take a vodka ( i'll take 5) topped w/ pinnacle, followed by a blue ribbon. or 30.

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How 'bout I just lie you on your back, stick a funnel in your mouth, and duct tape a bottle of vodka to the funnel? Efficiency and all that.

JEV said:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ya come in here singing a good song, but the proof of your worthiness (to be determined...) will be in your staying power through the tough times.

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I have no staying power but my exes will tell you I can give a woman the best 4 seconds of their lives. As for enduring the hard times I run away like an Italian cruise ship captain at the first sign of trouble. While you're clinging to life rafts and fighting other passengers to the death for food and water I'll be on shore having a Coke (with rum) and a smile while shamelessly flirting with the native bartenders.

Rusty Shackleford said:

Skins suck Caps suck Nats suck.

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But they don't swallow like you do in the alley behind the bar for beer money.

TiredRetired said:

So you like politics huh? Did you come here wanting to cash in on Doc's very generous offer of a free steak dinner to become our resident liberal or do you have your head screwed on RIGHT?

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I'm conservative and love steak (and any meat) so maybe we can work out a deal. What if I pretend to be liberal and settle for some barbecue pulled pork?

Big Dog said:

Ah just another blow hard, like we need more .................... and BTW, sports teams that don't wear black and gold don't count around here.

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2012 final standings

Redskins - 10-6
Steel Lickers - 8-8

Divisional title for Redskins? Oh yeah!
Divisional title for Steel Lickers? Yeah right.

Did the Redskins make the playoffs? Of course.
Did the Steel Lickers make the playoffs? HAHAHAHAHA!

# of starting rapists for the Redskins - 0
# of starting rapists for the Steel Lickers - 1

Just kidding, brother. I won't pick on the Steelers anymore. Not nice to tease retards.

Bloody Hell, this boy is pretty quick. May get interesting round here.

Rusty Shackleford said:

Bloody Hell, this boy is pretty quick. May get interesting round here.

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Don't be too impressed Rusty, he's got a teleprompter...

Hairy Jello said:

What if I pretend to be liberal and settle for some barbecue pulled pork?

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Sorry HJ, not gonna work. One cannot pretend to be a liberal. One cannot pretend to be that fucked up. Either you are or you are not. Besides, I love a steak as much as the next guy but I could never pretend to be a retard for a free one.

Again............Welcome.

Welcome aboard. But you lose the liberal thing. Liberals don't eat pulled pork unless it's made out of tofu and organic.

squerly said:

Don't be too impressed Rusty, he's got a teleprompter...

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is that the same as a alien arse probe???

Welcome Jello.

Aren't you that crazy cracker that likes his bacon limp / half cooked?

Hairy Jello said:

2012 final standings

Redskins - 10-6
Steel Lickers - 8-8

Divisional title for Redskins? Oh yeah!
Divisional title for Steel Lickers? Yeah right.

Did the Redskins make the playoffs? Of course.
Did the Steel Lickers make the playoffs? HAHAHAHAHA!

# of starting rapists for the Redskins - 0
# of starting rapists for the Steel Lickers - 1

Just kidding, brother. I won't pick on the Steelers anymore. Not nice to tease retards.

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I'll not embarrass you so soon, your one year implication seems to imply a dominance. Please take a look at the history and go lick your wounds from a Steeler ass kicking. Steelers 17 playoff games since 2000, Redskirts 4 ..... . 54 vs 33 in their history ....... Need I mention Super Bowls. Look a little further .......... ahhhh you better not, you may shit your pants! ......

Howdy Hairy ! How did you find us?

You have been a good boy all day so you can have potty privileges now.....

Big Dog said:

I'll not embarrass you so soon, your one year implication seems to imply a dominance. Please take a look at the history and go lick your wounds from a Steeler ass kicking. Steelers 17 playoff games since 2000, Redskirts 4 ..... . 54 vs 33 in their history ....... Need I mention Super Bowls. Look a little further .......... ahhhh you better not, you may shit your pants! ......

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Yeah I like history too. Maybe we can talk about the Napoleonic Wars or the Battle of Hastngs next. Those were the good old days.

Thank your terrible towel you only have to face us in preseason.

Ironman said:

Welcome Jello.

Aren't you that crazy cracker that likes his bacon limp / half cooked?

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Don't disrespect the limp bacon. Ever.

Catavenger said:

Howdy Hairy ! How did you find us?

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A friend on another forum told me about this place. Wasn't gonna join but another member started whining about how much this place sucked and that you all banned him for no reason. Basically his vagina was hurting and wanted to bleed his misery to the rest of us. Figured if he was banned from here you all can't be that bad.

Muleman said:

You have been a good boy all day so you can have potty privileges now.....

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Thanks but I already went on the gardenias in the forum lounge. By the way you may wanna change the soil.