"Honey, how does this look?" . . .and other traps women set!

The 'better half' of the relationship sets little traps like this all the time. The most famous of which is "does this make me look fat?" to which the most appropriate answer is NO, the 1/2 gallon of fudge tracks ice cream you eat each night makes you look fat. So with that as the set up, let me ask this. And I am serious! In fact I'm really serious about this.

So imagine YOUR wife holding a "green" Christmas decoration in her hand. And imagine a full 64 count box of Crayola Crayons. Now while looking at that box of crayons, realize that absolutely no color in that box that you can see is what your wife can imagine in her mind. Now comes the obvious question that was asked of me while standing in a store. "after I repaint the kitchen do you think this would match the new wall color?"

But what she really asked was: "after I have the kitchen repainted in the avocodo sort of color that I was thinking about but never really discussed with you and certainly never showed you, do you think this would look good in that room that you have no idea what I am going to do to because you weren't really paying attention anyway?"

So what was my appropriate answer, because stating the obvious didn't seem to work out so well for me

The appropriate answer is "Yes Dear." Even though the answer doesn't make sense, it won't really matter. She isn't listening to you anyways, and even if you speak really loudly and she does hear you, she really doesn't care what you have to say. That is assuming that she is like my wife.
It's like telling Gippolit that Kubota sells more tractors in the US than Kioti. No matter how you can back up your answer..........You are just plain WRONG!
"Of course the lovely Mrs. B is much better looking that Gippy I'm sure!:StickOutT "

rico304 said:

The appropriate answer is "Yes Dear." Even though the answer doesn't make sense, it won't really matter. She isn't listening to you anyways, and even if you speak really loudly and she does hear you, she really doesn't care what you have to say. That is assuming that she is like my wife.
It's like telling Gippolit that Kubota sells more tractors in the US than Kioti. No matter how you can back up your answer..........You are just plain WRONG!
"Of course the lovely Mrs. B is much better looking that Gippy I'm sure!:StickOutT "

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I agree with rico. Yes dear is the appropriate answer. This will work to your advantage to get on to your outside stuff you want to get done. No sense discussing what her plan really is, just let her go for it. It's the kitchen, I'm guessing she spends much more time in there than you do.
This also presents an opportunity to bring up the next implement you were thinking of adding to your collection.

B_Skurka said:

But what she really asked was: "after I have the kitchen repainted in the avocodo sort of color that I was thinking about but never really discussed with you and certainly never showed you, do you think this would look good in that room that you have no idea what I am going to do to because you weren't really paying attention anyway?"

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Bob,

At least the Lovely_Mrs_B started the conversation from the beginning. Mrs. Zoom starts the paragraph about 1/2 way through and I need to guess as to what we're talking about.

Without digging for it, what was the outcome of the livingroom? Can you answer the kitchen question from a reference point of the LR fiasco?

Rico's answer is probably the most correct but my alternative response (if I had this with Mrs. Zoom) would be along the lines of:

"It's so hard to tell with such small swatches. How about you get the kitchen painted first, then we'll consider this."

We also have a "6-week rule". If it doesn't seem right, we give it 6 weeks. After that time, we've either become accustomed to it or it's out of here. If the latter, we call that a "re-do" (and Mrs. Zoom has a lot of those...)

I hope she never reads this forum...

'fine' is no longer an appropriate response. Sometime around our 15th anniversary that answer simply stopped working. I'm actually surprised it took that long.

But seriously, what goes on in their minds? How could I ever imagine the color she had in her mind and how could I know if it was going to match?

And why do they do that stuff to us?

B_Skurka said:

But seriously, what goes on in their minds?

And why do they do that stuff to us?

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Bob,

Ahhh, you've been married for over 15 years. I would have expected you to understand that what I've quoted in this post is something that has and will continue forever to be something that we, as the male of the species will never know.

Edit: No offense to our female members. This is a spouse thingy...

Well gentlemen.....I am sorry for your luck. Although I am sure that you would not exchange your circumstance for anyone elses (Not publicly anyway) I have to say that I must be a pretty lucky fellow. the Mrs., for all her venus- ness, would not consider such a scenario. Although I generally approve her thoughts about certain things of a right brained nature, I am comforted in the thought that if I put up enough of a fight...HaHaHa....she will delay any final decisions until I have been sufficiantly schmooooozed and in turn reconsider my position.

respectfully submitted....

Just a little joke here explaining how the woman's mind works.

Man finds a lamp, rubs it, old genie pops out. Says to the man"I'm an old genie, so you can have 2 wishes. Don't make them too tough since I am old and not as powerful as I used to be." The man thinks for a while about what he could do to get filthy rich.
Tells the genie he wants him to build a bridge from the mainland to Hawaii with a toll booth in the middle. The genie looks at the man and said "C'mon! I told you something easy!" The man thinks again, this time he wished for a book explaining how the female's mind works.(thinking that every man would buy at least two copies!) The genie replied," hmmm." You could see him really thinking about it then he said, "Do you want that two lanes or 4?"

Bob don't worry about it, me and the MRS f15 have been at it for 42 years and i still don't undersand 1/2 of what she says, she totally confuse me at times switching from one subjet to the other then back again if she wasn't so damm cute, (and i could afford it) i would get rid of the old gal.

Frank.......... would you like me to send you mine?????? see picture...

Hmmm, well having actually gone through paint selection for my wife's craft room (Green). I just blurt out the truth, which in my case is; "Isn't that a little dark? Don't you think you need someting a little brighter?" She is happy with a response, because in the earlier years of our marriage, I didn't reply at all. I then graduated to an grunt or monosyllable answer. So a whole sentence indicating comprehension of the topic gets me off the hook and we actually talk about the choice(s). Of course, it has taken nearly 35 years for me to get to this point.

Dave, we've done the paint selection process together several times this year. I've lost every one of those that I've said "seems like it might be a bit dark" and now I just buy brighter light bulbs for the fixtures to offset the dark walls.

I will admit that I like the dark colors. 3 walls of my daughter's bathroom are now "pottery red" which is very dark and very dramatic looking. Our dining room is multi layers of dark green(s), plus brown and gold paint forming pattern that looks very much like mottled leather and our bedroom is a couple colors of dark reds, plus brown and green and when we had both of them painted I was very skeptical but now really like the dark walls. I still think every paint color the lovely Mrs_B picks out is too dark. But I admit to liking the overall look after it is done.

Frank, we are only going on our 21st year of marriage, so if you are at 42 and can only understand 1/2 of what your wife says then I guess I can only understand 1/4 of what mine says???

Well Bob, I don't think I'm that much farther ahead of you in understanding. It's just that now my wife at least knows what I think about her choices. Sounds to me like that's where you're at too.

I'm sitting here in my inside office here at home in a light tan room. It was a light gray for a year before I couldn't take it anymore and insisted on a lighter color. Not that I chose the color mind you, but I did get it changed to a lighter color.

I suppose, It's one of the prices we pay for our toys. I do have a shop filled with good stuff of my choice. I'd rather be confused over what goes on in the house if I get to run loose in the shop.

I will merely leave you all with a quote. This quote's origional context was from an officer of some british army fighting frenchmen if I recall, but its basis is timeless and all ecompassing...

Quote:

"... tis fact that Men shall lead short brutal lives ... and women .,.. long miserable ones..."

Here's my take on this. After 29 years of marriage. I feel that you can't live with them, nor can you live without them. Yes dear is appropriate for me. I remember the year I was deer hunting everyday during our 14 day season. My wife took a PMS shit fit and tore all the wallpaper half way down in the house and left it hanging off the walls. This was here way of saying I want to change the wallpaper. Mind you, I was working 40-50 hours a week also on top of taking some time to do some hunting. The wallpaper hung that way till the end of the season. I told her she was F-ckin Nuts. Yeah, we are still married. She can take a conipshit fit whenever she pleases. During the summer I just jump on the motorcycle and head out for a ride around the block. That is a 60-100 mile trip depending on which block I decide to go around.

Some apply................




1. Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and
values.
Stu said, "I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?"
Leroy replied, "I'm not sure, what was her maiden name.?"
______________________________________________________________
2. "Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the divorce
court Judge said, "And I've decided to give your wife $775 a week,"
"That's very fair, your honour," the husband said. "And every now and
then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."

_____________________________________________________________
3. A doctor examined a woman, took the husband aside, and said, "I
don't like the looks of your wife at all."
"Me neither doc," said the husband. "But she's a great cook and really
good with the kids."
______________________________________________________________
4. An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he
has been living with for the last 40 years.
The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words
that were used to put the curse on you.
The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."
________________________________________________________
5. A blonde calls Delta Airlines and asks, "Can you tell me how long
it'll take to fly from San Francisco to New York City?"
The agent replies, "Just a minute..."
"Thank you," the blonde says, and hangs up.
_________ _________________________________________
6. Moe: "My wife got me to believe in religion."
Joe: "Really?"
Moe: "Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in hell."
________________________________________________________
7. A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is
feeling.
"I'm O K. but I didn't like the four-letter-word the doctor used in
surgery," he answered.
"What did he say?" asked the nurse.
"OOPS!"
________________________________ ____________________
8. While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a
display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds
since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's
advice.
"What do you think?" I asked. "Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?"
"Better get a bikini," he replied. "You'd never get it all in one."
_____________________________________________________
9. Grandpa was driving with his 9 year old granddaughter and beeped the
horn by mistake. She turned and looked at him for an explanation.
He said, "I did that by accident."
She replied, "I know that, Grandpa."
He replied, "How did you know?"
She said, "Because you didn't say 'asshole' afterwards

JimR said:

I told her she was F-ckin Nuts.

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1. All women are crazy!
2. If they don't have a catastrophy in there life.. they'll make one up!
3. All women are crazy!