Forums Forums - Off Topic Forum FUN

Go Back   Forums Forums - Off Topic Forum FUN > Off Topic Forums > Junkman's Corner

Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 10-16-2018, 12:28 PM
Bamby's Avatar
Bamby Bamby is offline
Silver Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Near Wheeling W.V.
Posts: 3,295
Thanks: 520
Thanked 4,064 Times in 1,431 Posts
Bamby will become famous soon enough
Style: T66_BiggerFont
Default Tomahawk-Wielding Elizabeth Warren Vows To Take Land Back From The Pale Faces

WASHINGTON, D.C.—After receiving confirmation that she was at least 1/1024th Native American, Elizabeth Warren has embraced her fractional identity. Having gotten an authentic Native American outfit from a costume shop and armed herself with weapons she read on Wikipedia that a Native American might use -- such as the tomahawk -- Warren stood before a buffalo exhibit in the National Museum of Natural History at the Smithsonian to give a speech to the assembled press.

"You pale faces have taken my land, and have angered the Great Spirit!" Warren announced as she glanced down at her book of Native American terms. "This theft has angered my ancestors," Warren continued, though it was unclear if "ancestors" referred to her parents Pauline and Donald or people further back along her family tree. "You will return what is mine, or I will hit you with a wigwam." She paused to look at her book again. "No, that's not right."

Not all Democrats have supported Warren's new behavior. Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer appeared at the event to chastise Warren. "With all the tight races going on, this is a distraction! Stop it!" Schumer said.

Warren was undeterred. "Quiet, pale face!" Warren yelled before firing a poorly aimed arrow at Schumer.

"Aieee! She's gone 1/1024th savage!" Schumer shrieked before running away.

Warren was reportedly 1/1024th offended by the 1/1024th insult, which, if one does the math, makes it approximately 1/1,000,000th of an offense -- a literal microaggression. Warren and Schumer later apologized to each other and smoked a peace vape.

President Trump took Warren's threat seriously, though, and was planning to assemble a cavalry to stop her. He's reportedly looking for anyone who is at least 1/1024th a cowboy.
The Devil whispered in Trumps ear "You're not strong enough to withstand the storm".
President Trump whispered back, "I am That Storm".
Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Bamby For This Useful Post:
Danang Sailor (10-16-2018), jim slagle  (10-16-2018), mla2ofus (10-16-2018)
Old 10-16-2018, 01:19 PM
pirate_girl's Avatar
pirate_girl pirate_girl is offline
Poster Extraordinaire
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: NW Ohio
Posts: 45,147
Thanks: 9,696
Thanked 24,590 Times in 8,542 Posts
pirate_girl is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Tomahawk-Wielding Elizabeth Warren Vows To Take Land Back From The Pale Faces

Name:  FB_IMG_1539709904968.jpg
Views: 16
Size:  31.0 KB
Mother Superior Nana Patriot Nurse
Also a proud deplorable, and I say - USA!
Reply With Quote
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to pirate_girl For This Useful Post:
Bamby (10-16-2018), Danang Sailor (10-16-2018), jim slagle  (10-16-2018)

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
That the best you can do for Native American DNA, Elizabeth Warren? jim slagle Political Debate Forum 27 10-18-2018 07:15 PM
Elizabeth Warren Bamby Jokes_Forum 1 10-15-2018 07:12 PM
Cherokee Woman Blasts Elizabeth Warren: Catavenger Political Debate Forum 1 01-29-2018 05:06 PM
Elizabeth Warren Rants about Trump Catavenger Political Debate Forum 10 05-27-2016 01:51 PM
Elizabeth Warren SShepherd Political Debate Forum 10 12-18-2014 01:32 PM

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 05:20 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.2
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 2002 - 2018