What is a fair reward?

Okay, I just returned from a business trip and all my kids got their report card. I have 5 kids in 1st, 3rd, 6th, 8th, and Jr. in HS. All got straight A's!!

What would be an appropriate monitary reward for their hard work? So far I've been giving them $20 per grading period they get straight A's. That gives them $80 per year. The older two are now beginning to ask for a little more incentive. What thoughts do you guys have?

I sort of figure that I'm still getting off really cheap figuring that they should get college scholarships with 4.0 GPA's and scoring tops in standardized tests. I've created little money monsters, but it sure makes me proud to see them carry 4.0 GPA's! Thoughts?

I offer no solution but wonder the same thing. At what point is it a reward and at what point is it a bribe? And does it matter? I'm confused over the whole issue.


BTW . . . for the amount of time you were in Hawaii, it was not worth the flight time you had to endure in the air! I hate that flight. It is one of the reasons I really dislike going to Hawaii, the journey itself is a nightmare. I am lucky enough to fly first class about 50% of the time (I don't pay for it I use 'air miles' to upgrade) and even in the front cabin the air time to Hawaii is tough to bear.

how about a be a pilot first flight. cost you 35.00 and the oldest kid can go up for an hour

Welcome back Dargo!
Congrats! That is impressive.
I'll suggest 100 for the HS'er and 50 for the others ...if you can swing it. It's a shame, but 20 bucks does not buy much nowdays.

B_Skurka said:

BTW . . . for the amount of time you were in Hawaii, it was not worth the flight time you had to endure in the air! I hate that flight. It is one of the reasons I really dislike going to Hawaii, the journey itself is a nightmare. I am lucky enough to fly first class about 50% of the time (I don't pay for it I use 'air miles' to upgrade) and even in the front cabin the air time to Hawaii is tough to bear.

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I have to agree. I just returned from my post office run and ordered a book of matches; rather than stamps. Duh! What is really strange is, I don't smoke and never have. Yeah, the 5 days there and 2 days flying isn't really a good mix. Each of the days flying included pulling an all nighter. I'm going to have to cash in some of my miles and begin to fly first class. I'm not all that tall, but with my ass planted firmly against the back of my seat, my knees now are hitting the back of the seat in front of me. Once the person in front of me leans back, there is physically no way to even get my laptop opened in the space to do any work or try to watch a movie. I asked a flight attendant, and she told me that the seats are 4" closer than last year to allow more on a flight. When a 5'11 guy can't fit (due to height), I think they've gone too far! I'd say that flying "economy" is over for really tall people (like anyone over 6', or any overweight people). So far, I've noticed that American and Delta have now made their seating for a 5'10 (max) and about 170 pound person!!

Doc said:

Welcome back Dargo!
Congrats! That is impressive.
I'll suggest 100 for the HS'er and 50 for the others ...if you can swing it. It's a shame, but 20 bucks does not buy much nowdays.

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Thanks Doc! I appreciate your comments. And, as I was replying to Bob, my oldest just walked away with a C note. I figure that he is the closest to getting offers from colleges.

Dargo, it's not the result that matters but their endeavour.

Dargo,

Do you plan on anything large as a graduation gift (in whole or part)? If so, I would stick with the smaller bills for the older kids (too late for the one that just took the hundred) and say that their efforts are noted and their reward will be more noticable on their graduation gift.

Brian

PS. Want to trade a couple kids??? Nice job and my congrats to all of you. Nicely done.

daedong said:

Dargo, it's not the result that matters but their endeavour.

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Vin, I will respectfully disagree with you to a point and still agree with you to point.

If my daughter were only capable of getting a "C" average, and she worked and got a "C" then I would be very proud of her efforts (the endeavor). But in the real world where you have to earn a living and support a family, then there is a point at which the results count for a lot more than the effort. When reality slaps you in the head and says Bob, you will never make it as a quarterback in the NFL then you can't tell me that my efforts/endeavor is what matters. So we have to strike some sort of balance with out kids.

I still don't know the answer to Dargo's question, my only child is 10 years old, she is also top of her class straight A student, but she is also fairly lazy and gets A's anyway. . . so without much effort, she is top of her class. At some point that is going to bite her in the butt, reality is going to slap her, and when it does I will say your point is dead on accurate because she didn't put forth the effort. And your point will have been made. So I'd say it is a situational issue.

Dargo said:

Yeah, the 5 days there and 2 days flying isn't really a good mix. Each of the days flying included pulling an all nighter. I'm going to have to cash in some of my miles and begin to fly first class. . . I asked a flight attendant, and she told me that the seats are 4" closer than last year to allow more on a flight. When a 5'11 guy can't fit (due to height), I think they've gone too far! I'd say that flying "economy" is over for really tall people (like anyone over 6', or any overweight people). So far, I've noticed that American and Delta have now made their seating for a 5'10 (max) and about 170 pound person!!

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Funny, I am a "million miler" with American and I find they have more room than most of the other airlines. I'm 5'11' and typically find my knees are in contact with the seat in front of me on every airline except American. But I think they only offer the wider spacing on some of their planes that fly some of their runs. I think those wider spacing planes fly out of their major hubs, and I don't think they include the commuter planes, etc.

My kids get $100 for all A's per quarter. Nothing for anything less than an A. If they get say 5 A's and one B they get $50, so there is incentive to strive for the all A bonus. Considering both are in accelerated classes already I think it is a good system.

They're doing a heck of a lot better than me. I goofed off all through school and graduated high school with a 2.0. I knew I was too much of a hell raiser for college so I joined the Marines Now I'm taking college classes at 41 and I am compelled to maintain a 4.0 to set the example and pace for my kids and I don't get no stinkin' check for my A's.

Amount of "reward"?

How about pizza once a week instead of hamburger helper?
Fix the leak in the roof over their bed instead of making them empty the bucket...

I found that it doesn't really matter to the kids as long as you are acknowleding their efforts. You are the one benefitting the most so whatever makes you feel comfortable.

Wannafish said:

You are the one benefitting the most so whatever makes you feel comfortable.

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You know, you are exactly right...for the short run. I am the one benefitting the most for now and in the near future. However, I think I am getting them to work hard so they will ultimately benefit in the future from their education. So, in a way, I do think I am being a little selfish, but in a way I'm not.

Right now several of the little rats are growing bored with the usual school "awards" for their academics, and I'm afraid that they will not try as hard. I am now making them buy their own "cool" items, whether it be a video game or a special pair of shoes. They have to ask us to get that money out of the bank for them out of their account. Believe me, they know their balance. What they don't know is that no money ever leaves their account. Yes, ole dad forks out the real money, but they think it is coming out of their account. When they turn 18, I intend to give them all the money in their account as their birthday present - showing then that no money has ever been deducted. I'm still yet to figure out how I can make them not tell their younger siblings what I'm doing when I do give them their money. Any ideas on that?

They put all their birthday money in there, their money for straight A's, and any money they earn for doing chores etc. Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm trying to teach them fiscal responsibility this way; if they don't have the money in their account, they can't spend it. So far it really seems to be working. You should hear them doing the math figuring how much more they need to save to buy a particular item they want.

Brent, I'll admit to screwing up as a parent here. I no longer do this, and I don't know why. But I think this thread is going to get it started again.

This is slightly off your topic but still related to work = reward.

When my daughter was 5 years old we started to give her an allowance. $5 per week. She was required to do some minor jobs around the house.

We took 4 jars. Each jar was labeled with a sticker.
I don't recall the exact ratio we set up, but I believe we divided the $5 into the jars as follows:
When she turned 6 years old we increased the allowance by $1.00 per week, and simply added $0.25 to each of the 4 jars. We did the same when she turned 7 so she got $7 per week. Etc. For some reason I don't recall, it all stopped shortly after her 9th birthday. So its been inactive for about a year and a half.

The rules were as follows:
Not sure if any of this helps you, but it sort of shows how to HOPEFULLY teach some fiscal responsibility to a child. Don't know if it will actually work or not!!! But as you were planning on giving your kids bank accounts to them as gifts, it is another way of showing them they actually have money and perhaps even that their money really needs to be divided up into priorities or goals.

Cool Bob, thanks for the ideas. Maybe I should do something like that and tell them that if they get a full ride scholarship, I'll simply give them all of their "college" money when they graduate in addition to my little deal I'm doing now.

Dargo said:

Cool Bob, thanks for the ideas. Maybe I should do something like that and tell them that if they get a full ride scholarship, I'll simply give them all of their "college" money when they graduate in addition to my little deal I'm doing now.

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Hey I ama frikkin genius!