How far will BigAl get before he gets stuck?

OK over the last few months we as a group have had to endure BigAls constant attacks on us True Snowcat owners. So a few of us have decided to put up a poll and to take bets on how far BigAl will actually get in his "PIMPED OUT" Kristi KT7. The winner will be treated to a case fine beer. (if your a Kristi owner that translates Budwieser. If your a Snow Trac or other snowcat owner that would be Samual Adams) OK so post how far you feel he can go before getting stuck. The test will be conducted along with another challenge that BigAl himself posted on a ranch up in Idaho. We plan to have video coverage of that event as well as tons of photos. Please feel free to describe the event as you see it unfolding in your head. No one but BigAl will hold anything against you.

Personally I feel everything will go just fine. He will get in and start the KT7 up. The engine will purr itself into life and proceed to warm up. BigAl will pull back on the yoke and the big gal will smoothly roll off the trailer and down the ramps. BigAl being pretty proud at this moment will start to play around in the parking lot. Mean while in his aircraft head set he is listening to Earth Wind and Fire Boogie nights. He is manipulating the kristi hydraulics and performing some pretty cool manuvers in the parking lot. Left side will go 2 feet higher then the right. He will the raise the front then the back. The crowd in the parking is no longer just the Forums group but the entire population of Elk City. The crowd is uweing and awhing his vehicles manuvers. He then decides to head out and join the rest of the snowcats. He will finally take his place in the jurnals of Snowcatum. As he gets closer to the end of the parking lot he hears a funny noise over his music. By now Berry White is playing but doesnt quit sound right. He pulls off the head set and hears a flopping sound. The crowd goes from uuws and awwes to screams and shrieks of terror. Mothers grab there children and cover there eyes! BigAl looks out over his tracks and sees not tracks but just tires. Both tracks have unbolted and laced off. he comes to a smooth but rather fast stop. He opens his cockpit hatch and jumps out. He slowly looks back. What he sees is truley a scary sight. He now sees he really does have a bath tub. It no longer has tracks. just small wheels. One is still spinning as if saying to it self I can keep going I can I can. The crowd slowly turns away and walks back. They came to see one of theres finally make it in this cold bitter world of snowcatting. Instead they realized that the cold vastness of there parking lot has once again claimed that honor from them. Broken hearted they go back to there cars and slowly drive away BigAl realizes hes not alone. He looks behind him and sees his friend MIke approach. In his friends hand he sees the TOW strap. he swore it would not come to this. He knows in his heart what he must do. He turns back to the KT7 and realizes it is the only thing he can do. He slowly pulls his sidearm. Its a crome plated .25 caliber Raven arms pistol. The pearl grips gleam in the sun light. He slowly brings his arm up and sights down along the barrel. He pulls the trigger and the round goes exaclty where he knew it must go. The round peirces the the heart of the machine. Hydraulic fluid spurts out in pulsating streams. Slowly the life goes out and so does the dream. There is a moment of silence and him and Mike just stand there. Mike patts him on the back and says "Well I guess we dont need this" and tosses the tow strap. "Come on BigAl you can ride in my Snowcat" Reluctantly BigAl moves on as if in a dream. He enters into MIkes Snowcat and is amazed at how nice it is. "Man this is pretty nice" he says as the fog is starting to clear. Suddenly an idea crosses his mind. YETTI II! But this time he will start with a REAL snowcat! BigAl is seen from that day on with a smile on his face. The death of his beloved Yetti is a distant memory. He will show them. He will show them.

Good God man !!! That was beautiful !

I cried my eyes out as I read about me pulling out my little pop pistol .

I'll tell you what . I'll actually serve you that beer and bow to you ,if you can take my Yetti ! Otherwise I may shove that beer up your arse! <- English for ASS!

I'm just sitting back and laughing at both of you. Just let me know where and when, I'll bring the video camera!!!

BigAl said:

Good God man !!! That was beautiful !

I cried my eyes out as I read about me pulling out my little pop pistol .

I'll tell you what . I'll actually serve you that beer and bow to you ,if you can take my Yetti ! Otherwise I may shove that beer up your arse! <- English for ASS!

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So where do you want me to TAKE your Yetti? I'm sure I can drag it anywhere we go. I still have that TOW strap!

BOB we are still on for the Idaho Snowcat Expedition to the hot springs and remote cabins (and BigAls challenge to you). You need to bring your snow trac. After that we plan on hitting up the Yellowsnow club in Elko Nevada for a day of back country skiing then off to Yellowstone for a day of touring in the snow cats!

Snowcat Operations said:

So where do you want me to TAKE your Yetti? I'm sure I can drag it anywhere we go. I still have that TOW strap!

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Yea.... Big words from a "one eyed fat man". "Eat my shorts" ! uh... errr.... I mean yellow snow!

BigAl said:

Yea.... Big words from a "one eyed fat man". "Eat my shorts" ! uh... errr.... I mean yellow snow!

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Uhhmmmm Sounds tempting but NO.


I was hoping that my other fellow snowcatters who have been abused by BigAl would contribute there version of the events that will take place in Idaho later this year. Come on I know you guys are adventurist or you wouldnt have a snowcat! Lets hear your version!

Hey BigAl And yes BigAl please post your diatribe as well. Its always good for a laugh!

Snowcat Operations said:

Hey BigAl And yes BigAl please post your diatribe as well.

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Com on Mike ! You know I hate big words !!! And the level of my diatribe is between me and my doctor and I refuse to post it here . Besides the doctor says in another 6 months it should be completely cleared up but that I should stay away from Snow Trac Women unless I want to be reinfected . The itching is the worst part . The burning sensation isn't much fun either .

Oh by the way Mike . I love the results of the poll so far !!!! . You are going !!!

Of course you opted to vote more than once. But hey I figured you would give your self a few votes for the good! I didnt think you would post on it 20 times though. Kristi owners!

I am predicting that Al will proubly jump aboard his KT7 and fire it up. He will drive it gracefully down the first part of the ramps, but when it climbs off the bottom of the ramps onto the snow the tracks will fail spectacularly, they will shear, snapping like twigs under the strain. The KT7 will land on its belly. With no brakes the KT7 will slide, Al still on board, down the slopes towards the sea. Miraculously, due to its similarity to a bathtub it will ski onto the calm waters of the sea, and bob gently on the swells, water lapping at its sides.
At this point Al will begin to feel peckish, and fire up the grill. His alcohol laden breath will ignite, the KT7 will errupt into flame!
By this time Mike will have swum out to Al on the flaming KT7 with his famous tow strap. He will hook on, and signal to Bob to ask Mrs Bob to start pulling the KT7 back in. Eventually the flaming bathtub will come ashore. All 3, Mike, Bob and Al will relieve themsleves onto the KT7 to douse the flames. The KT7 will be extinguished, surrounded by a pool of yellow snow. And there it will remain, for all to see (and smell). Al will cry alot, then stangle Mike with the tow strap. Bob and Mrs Bob will depart, making sure they leave on time, so their spit roasted Chiwauwa will not be overdone by the time they get home.

Oh, and BTW Mike, I have 6 more posts than you

My goodness, you folks sure have some good imaginations, you ought to write a book!

Mith said:

Eventually the flaming bathtub will come ashore. All 3, Mike, Bob and Al will relieve themsleves onto the KT7 to douse the flames. The KT7 will be extinguished, surrounded by a pool of yellow snow.

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Ahhh, slight problem. I have a "shy" bladder.

It will have to burn itself out.

B_Skurka said:

Ahhh, slight problem. I have a "shy" bladder.

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Now ... Don't you worry about it none "Pee Wee". I won't let anyone make fun of you ...

Mith

you

do not have 6 more posts!

He wont get stuck at all and kick the shit out of every snowcat to ever go up against him!
beds, BigAl, Dargo, Doc, Lyndon, PBinWA, thcri
63.64%

http://www.forumsforums.com/3_9/member.php?u=17

I see these people are trying to start a riot! LYNDON! Shame on you. You are just trying to cause more problems! Good Job!

This COULD happen:
All was going well for BigAl and his Yetti edition Snowcat. Several days into our Expedition we started to notice signs of a rather large animal wondering around our camp late at night. In particular around BigAls Snowcat. Signs of rather large feet imprints were seen. The Expedition leader (that would be me) decide to head back to civilization. On our trip back the convoy was attacked by a large hairy creature. It must have stood 10 feet tall and was covered in white hair. Screams erupted on the com sets as several expedition members whitnessed what I must report here. BigAls Snowcat was the source of the attack the creature was ruthless and pretty dam discusting. It was photographed Hummping BigAls snowcat. It managed to sneak up behind the vehicle and thats when all the hummping broke out. The creature lifted up the rear of the Snowcat and proceeded to make a rather embarassing monster of himself. The tracks were off the ground and BigAl was trapped. The front door was wedged closed since the rear was so high up in the air. The scene was kaotic as several members tried to accelerate to get out of the area. Several crashes ensued but the creature still sexually assualted the Yetti edition snowcat. BigAl was last scene being dragged away in his snowcat unable to escape. Someone had glued shut his kittycat toilet seat escape hatch. Search crews are still out searching for any survivors.

Ah, but the English snowtracs weren't there, so they live to fight another day in another way! Sneaking their way across sea and land, they arrived at the scene and rescued the Snow maiden, who was a witch (a white one) and she restored all the snowtracs in gratitude for being rescued from the clutches of the evil Kristi man. For her kindness to the snowcat people she was then rewarded by her wizard and restored to being a maiden again. The evil Kristi man was never heard of again as he disappeared in a cloud of foul smelling smoke and was corked up in a bottle of urine (for those with weak bladders) and buried very deeply under a glacier.

Hey Al . . . I think IceQueen just buried you under a glacier in a jar of pee

Ice Queen said:

Ah, but the English snowtracs weren't there, so they live to fight another day in another way! Sneaking their way across sea and land, they arrived at the scene and rescued the Snow maiden, who was a witch (a white one) and she restored all the snowtracs in gratitude for being rescued from the clutches of the evil Kristi man. For her kindness to the snowcat people she was then rewarded by her wizard and restored to being a maiden again. The evil Kristi man was never heard of again as he disappeared in a cloud of foul smelling smoke and was corked up in a bottle of urine (for those with weak bladders) and buried very deeply under a glacier.

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That poll aint looking to good neither!

I'm taking all my toys and going home ! You all are mean .

And everyone knows once the Snow Maiden got "Boink" , she can't be a "Maiden" no more and I don't care what that wizard says ! Dumb ass wizard !


And Mouse Ear is playing with the poll again !

Be very careful of English 'dumb ass wizards' as they are very different from American ones, and the same goes for the maiden. Snowtracs rule!

Ice Queen said:

Be very careful of English 'dumb ass wizards' as they are very different from American ones, and the same goes for the maiden. Snowtracs rule!

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Yes Maam , Sorry ....... It won't happen again .......

You can run BIG AL but you can't hide from us Snow Trac owners! If you need a hand getting out from under your pissed stained glacier give any Snow trac owner a shout as they where designed to go over, around, through and under glaciers where Kristi owners seem to end up.....in the